I am a horrible Livejournal user. I always forget about this account and I never use it. What with Myspace, Gaia...I mean, I visit OOMPH!.de more than this! Ah well.
Sun, Sep. 17th, 2006, 04:15 pm
Yeah. I was so excited last night because of my awesome performance at Dekalb, but today...just reread the title. I got up at seven in the morning so I could go to church with Austin. I felt like complete and total crap but I really wanted to just spend some time with him, only him, that was longer than the freakin' ten minutes before school starts. So I went to church.
"Whatever that means. You know, God probably sits up there in Heaven and yells 'hey, angels, its the funny guy again!' whenever I start praying." --Lex
We watched some of the Passion of the Christ. I'd never seen it before, even though my mom got it for us. (She only got it to "keep up appearances", as Austin put it) ...Wow. Now I understand what Emi was telling me when she said people were walking out of the theater dead silent. You'd have to have been there in the room with us, watching what Jesus was going through to really get it. Yeah, it was some actors in a chosen location with authentic-looking props, but still.
After class, I still felt kinda sick. Well, it mostly my head and the fact that I was freezing. I wasn't really hungry and the sight of all that food at the lunch and the smell just made it worse. (Not that I'm saying the food was bad, mind you. I had some darn excellent rice. But it was just because of how I was feeling.)
I was looking forward to being able to go somewhere with Austin later on today, but looks like that's a no go. :( We were both looking forward to it too.
Ok, enough of my whining.
If you check out my userpics, they're all icons I made! I only put the ones I'm REALLY proud of. Not all the craptastic ones I made awhile ago. I need to make more Rammstein ones, I've only made the one which is my default pic.
I don't know if mom will ever think of letting me get GlaubeLiebeTod. And I know for a fact she went through my Rammstein cds. I had taken them all to the band competition yesterday (yes, cases and all) and then this morning left them stacked on the floor against my bookcase. I figured 'hey, I'll only be gone for church, and why would she come into my room anyway?' Well, she went in my room to get the bedsheets and ended up doing a little bit of cleaning (I'll admit, my room was messy, but hey, I was going to clean it myself, dear maternal unit of mine). She was good at trying to hide it, but she didn't count on my OCD powers! For you see, when I stack things like cds, I make sure they are all perfectly even on the sides. When mom put them back after going through them, they weren't in a perfectly even stack.
The fact that last thing she knew I had one Rammstein cd (Sehnsucht..you all remember the cover incident?) and now I have six (I have one of the singles if you're wondering how I have six when
they've only put out five) is probably causing a little blood vessel in her brain to pop. It's probably because of Austin that she forgot about them. He stayed for awhile after he dropped me off, so it totally would have left her mind.
I just need to wrap this up. It's pretty long. But let me revive the tradition of me ended with some pic.
<--My OOMPH! boy, Dero Goi. I've totally talked to him through email (super nice, not all arrogant). Yeah, you're all jealous, I know. ;)
Because I have MySpace now. And only one of my friends has a Livejournal. Everyone has a freakin' Myspace now it seems. But I do like to use Livejournal for its icons. Icons that I put on my MySpace. *gasp* I'm turning into a MySpace junkie! Not to mention GaiaOnline....Rammstein guild fun! Seriously, if it weren't that guild and it's people, I wouldn't be on Gaia.
Mon, Dec. 26th, 2005, 11:18 pm
Hughes is hot and he's really sweet...I hate that he died, I actually cried. Well, anyway, I can totally see him stalking his girlfriend and then kidnapping her! He kidnapped like two people in the series!
I'm in big Full-Metal Alchemist mood, its crazy. I think its now up there with Saiyuki. the two are fighting for the position of most loved anime in my mind. You know, I wonder who would win, Ed or Goku? Sanzo or Roy?
Oh, I just found a really hot pic of Roy! And I just found one of him and Hawkeye! Of course, its them at Hughes' funeral, but that was so sweet. "This is rain..." Oh my gosh, I found this pic, its Hawkeye in normal clothes (she looks very pretty...well, she always does, but more so now) and Roy and Hughes, also normal clothes are standing a way behind her and Roy has this smile on his face. Hughes is patting him on the back with this knowing grin.
Oh my god! Roy, I can not believe you! I was trying to save you from pervy pigdom by destroying those mini-skirts!
This is what I got first...this next one is the awesomely fun one I got!
Go Roy! You flirted with Hawkeye! I did get one that said she fell for you because she got drunk. I can see myself making fun of Ed...Hughes breakdancing?! There were a few ones I took that said Ed got beat up by Roy for dancing with Hawkeye.
I tell you, I'm having a fun time with these quizzes. They're awfully fun when one is hyper. Oh my gosh! I found on about how my day would go on the Lost island...I have to check this out...
Dang right, I'd flirt with Sawyer!! Who wouldn't? (I didn't manipulate that answer in any way, shape or form)
Yes! I have ensnared Sanzo! And he won't be going anywhere...his spot in my cagewill be reserved. And um...ok, but Goku just needs to stay away from me, I don't wanna be eaten!!
Ok, I'm going to stop this entry, but I will not stop with the quizzes! They are too much fun!!!
1.) I watched some of Wolf's Rain
2.) Toboe rocks my socks
3.) I read a lot of Eldest recently
4.) That should make Austin happy
5.) I am anxious about tomorrow (is that the right word?)
6.) Tomorrow is the last day of school this week
7.) I plan to spend Friday completely relaxed
9.) Go Ein! Ein loves music too!
10.) Spike doesn't like Ein (the jerk!)
11.) I will be putting random pics up
12.) Yes, the next one will also be Cowboy Bebop
13.) That anime should rock everyone's socks
14.) Lost isn't new for another two weeks
15.) It sucks major
16.) Josh Holloway got held up by gunpoint
17.) Harold Perrineau or whatever his last is got stalked
19.) Hey! Don't make Jet wait! For he is sexier than you!
20.) HP-GoF comes out in three weeks
21.) But it doesn't have David Thewlis
22.) I want my Remus!
23.) I watch Kingdom of Heaven the other day
24.) Tiberius is really hot
25.) I don't know how I didn't notice this before
26.) He's very hot
27.) Especially when he's wearing black like when you first see him
28.) Big Furry French Man is a jerk to the extreme
29.) Mom promised that she would never marry me to a Big Furry French Man
30.) My bed is very warm because I put the flannel sheets on
31.) But I still sleep with the fan on
32.) I need more Pop-Tart doodles for my binder
34.) That should amuse some people.
35.) Megan has no clue what I'm talking about right now in our IM
36.) I am very anxious for tomorrow, now that you mention it
38.) I recently got the newest Shonen Jump issue
39.) The Naruto chapters made me quite sad
40.) 40 is good number to stop on
Kannon is awesome (the god/goddess from Saiyuki...there's a Buddhist term for it, but its too hard to spell without looking it up).
-Hakkai-I'm worried about him. I sealed his wound, but I'm worried about the blood loss...
-Kannon-No problem! For me, nothing is impossible! *strikes a pose* For I am holier than thou!
-Hakkai-*to Jiroshin* ...Are all gods this way?
-Jiroshin-...Uh, no. Not as such.
I feel very bouncy! I have Mountain Dew! Down with the sickness...
MANY THANKS TO MY GOOD, BESTEST FRIEND MEGAN FOR COPYING THE CD!!
Now if only she would bring back my dvd...and stop dissing Lost long enough to watch it...lol!
Sawyer is a complete stud and he is mine. Forget Mom. HE'S MINE!!
<---It's Konzen and Goku!
I forgot my English stuff at school, so I can't finish up my RRR. Oh well, there's always tomorrow.
I'm almost done with Angels and Demons! Yay! The coolest part just happened! The Hassassin just killed the third carndinal bring stringing the guy up by his wrists to the ceiling of a church, then piling up the pews underneath the cardinal and setting them on fire. The naked carndinal, branded with the ambrigramitac word of "Fire", gets burned to death!
Then Langdon nearly dies, which isn't nearly as cool. Oh, but really wasn't cool was that that Hassassin jerk killed Commander Olivetti by twisting his head all the backward and breaking his neck. Whats up with that?!
Anyway, I got the coolest idea for a drawing from the scene. Nickolai hanging by his wrists with a sick grin (My lovely machocist vampire *pats his head*) with Layre below him with the proudest expression...I haven't really figured out his pose yet, or his outfit...Andre sitting facing away from both of them with his usual depressed look.
Hey, why is Nalah never in the pictures of Layre and his fledgings? She is one...forget you! You have no real part in the story! You're just in there because I needed more female characters! (I now have two by the way...neither of them major)
<---Roy and Maes are so hot! I love them both!
Ok, I think I will finish now...
See You Space Cowboy...
(Jet Black rocks! "I'm Jet Black and I'm 36 years old. People always tell me that I don't look it. You should never judge people by looks...or by how much hair they have.")
Haha, I love Jet...and shame on you if you don't know who he is! Watch Cowboy Bebop, folks! Its awesome!!
I just had an eggroll. Chicken, not vegetable. Vegetable eggrolls are nasty. I think the eggroll messed with my mind. WHOOOOOOOoooooo00000ooo...
I can't say the same for the other side of the school!!
Hey, somebody on Gaia agreed with me that Alec rules the pants off this world and the next. Yay for Alec!!
There's really no point to this entry...I just felt like writing.
I went to book club, scared some people. Jennifer declared that she's now positive that I'm insane. Then in manga club...it was kinda boring. I don't know anyone all that well there, except for Holli. But she had to do some research and Jeremy was there...yeah, you figure it out. And she had to leave early.
Oh, go Norwell soccer team against East Noble! I'm trying to be enthusaistic and supportive and stuff of other Norwell activities that are non-band. Soccer's ok, so I'l start with it. But I still don't get off-sides.
-Joey-Dad-hunting is a sensitive activity for Phoebe. She gets all vunerable and...stuff. So that's where we come in. To be supportive and crap.
-Rachel-...Ok, you just let me know when to do which.
I watched Friends today and that was the episode I watched. How exciting. Go Chandler!
<---This is Jet. He's awesome. Spike is very cool...Ed rocks everybody's socks, she's hiliarious...Ein is the cutest anime dog I've ever seen...Faye is cool too, a bit obnoxious, but cool.
Haha, you thought because I put a picture up that my entry was over.
Though I'll probably stop soon. I'm running out of things to say. You know, this really isn't a journal. My journal's in my notebook. This is more a place to ramble. Kinda like my Gaia journal. But rambling is fun!
Okay, entry over.
See you, Space Cowboy...
Past couple days I have been falling back into my old thought patterns. Now, since no one really pays that much attention, you probably don't know what I might when I say "my old thought patterns". Well, you don't need to know. I probably don't trust you enough to tell you anyway. Most people would like to offer me "advice" or "help", neither of which are wanted. Or they would want to take the easy way out and send me to a therapist.
What's the point behind a therapist? Here, let's send you to a COMPLETE stranger where you can tell them all your problems, though you won't tell your friends. Yeah, that makes sense.
Anyway...I hate feeling this way. I felt this way for the past year, ever since the Kokomo competition last year. I remember everything about that day. That day screwed up everything I knew. Everyone was there, but I bet nobody could tell me what happened that day.
Ha, told you. I win.
What is the point to being depressed? It makes things easier, yeah. Let's sit and whine about our lives. If you're depressed, its because you can't find the strength to make yourselves happy. Yes, that's right. You have to make yourself happy. No one is going to come along with the key to your happiness. It all comes down to you. It takes strength...I've been working at it for the last couple weeks and guess what? Somehow, life has magically become better.
Yeah, it hurts sometimes to be happy when you don't be. Smile when you want to frown. But the outcome is so much better...I would rather walk with a smile that hurts than sit and consider suicide. And if someone tries to get you down? Tell 'em to burn. Tell 'em to get out of your way, they're blocking your path.
If I'm sad, slap me and tell me to get over it. Things move on. Time doesn't stand still. I am fine.
That's all I wanted to say.
I started reading the book Austin told me to read. It's pretty funny.
I do love my new icon. Its Hughes and Elysia! I love Hughes...He's hilarious. "Where were you?!" "Hiding around the corner. If things went bad, someone had to live to tell the tale!"
Marse Hughes Which Fullmetal Alchemist Character are you? brought to you by Quizilla
Check that...and I didn't even engineer it that way! I was kinda going for Al...but Maes is cool too. GO HUGHES!
I don't wanna do that dumb English paper...the one about interviewing. I have a people-phobia or something (not as bad as before though, I'm getting over it) and I really don't want to interview someone. I think I'll just make up questions about a topic then "interview" and write my paper. (Translation-I'm going to lie, say I did the paper, and make up all details I don't know.)
Dang it! I still can't get Al!
I came up with an idea for a drawing, so I wanna try it out tonight...since I probably won't have anything better to do. I usually never have anything to do. Oh! Ok, I'll draw and watch my Wolf's Rain anime! And Eat popcorn! PERFECT!! *gasp*
I miss Caden. He's so funny and sweet. And cute. He's really cute. I got twelve kisses yesterday. Dad got none. I rubbed his face in it.
Caden is so adorable.
I have been working more on my storyline, so I think everyone should give me a cookie. Or a pickle. Or three tator tots.
Well, I will try to write more, so that Megan will be happy. I will even post an image of something...Let me look through my numerous files and find something.
<---This is my favorite pyscho German necromancer ever. Faust VIII and his wife (she was alive when he married her, so don't be looking at him weird [I know there's a term for people who love dead bodies, but I can't spell it])
Birthday date: April 6, 1990
Hair Colour: brown
Eye Colour: blue
Place of Birth: Fort Wayne, IN
Current Place: the computer room
Best Physical Feature: I dunno?
Hobby: writing and bunch of other stuff
Blood Type: I dunno...geez, if I ever get in an accident, the paramedics are going to have a problem on their hands
Show Size: 7 1/2....8? Er...
Weight (don’t be shy): ...I don't kno that one for sure either.
Drink: Mountain Dew or Grape-flavored water
Food: fried chicken
Colour: dark blue, emerald green, silver, black...
Ice Cream: cookies&creme
Gum Flavor: I don't like gum period
Celebrity: Adrien Brody...cause he's talented and amazingly hot (same for Johnny Depp)
Veggie: I don't like vegetables, but I'll say lettuce
Animal: any kind of cat and wolves
Chip Flavor: cheesy...like Doritos!!
Greek Mythology figure: oh! The big three-headed dog thing! Shoot...what's his name?! (Fluffy!! )
Board Game: Monopoly!!
Daydream: a lot of stuff...it mostly ends up on paper anyway. How do you think Nickolai, Layre, Andre, Black, etc got created? (And Aubrey and Brian? Holli likes them)
Book: Dracula, DragonLance, Fight Club, and I assume manga does not count here, right?
Movie: Fight Club, The Mummy, Van Helsing, Queen of the Damned, X2, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, and lots of others
web comic: Hsu and Chan...Neurotically Yours wins best web cartoon though!
Fandom: I don't really get what fandoms are...I think I know, but I'm not sure
Candy: Hershey's or a Cookie's and Creme bar
Item of Clothing: jeans
Cartoon: Neurotically Yours (Signed Your Lord and Master, Foamy!)
Flower: black rose!
This or That
Cat or Dog: cat
Sky or Earth: Earth
Water or Fire: Fire
Light or Dark: Dark
Apple or Orange: Apple
Day or Night: Night
Mountains or Oceans: Mountains
Pink or Blue: Blue
Gold or Silver: Silver
Love or Loss: Love
Reading or Writing: writing, most definetely!!
Singing or Dancing: both, though I'm good at neither...that doesn't stop me though!
Winter or Summer: Winter
Spring or Autumn: Autumn
Wolf or Pig: Wolf
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla
Obi-Wan or Qui-Gon: Obi-Wan!! He is the hottest Jedi ever! *shoves Anakin down a hole and buries him* Take that, Raeann! I just buried your imaginary-Jedi-boyfriend alive!! MUAHAHAHA!!
Wolverine or Cyclops: Wolverine! Good thing the question wasn't "Wolverine or Pyro?" I don't think I could chose!!!
Pirate or Ninja: Jack Sparrow...or Kakashi? Hm...
Brunette or Blond: Brunette
Pepsi or Coke: Coke
Root beer or Dr. Pepper: root beer
Would you consider yourself…?
Shy: yes, terribly
Outspoken: when I need to be
Selfish: not usually....
Indifferent: happens increasingly often
Reckless: no..I don't think
Bitter: not really
Indulgent: When it comes to my nephew, I give him his (almost) every heart's desire! He's so adorable...I can't help it!
Polite: Amazingly, yes
Tolerant: I would like to think so
Intelligent: Yes *hears people muttering* I AM, DANG IT!!
Imaginative: Yeah, that's why I write
Stubborn: Not usually...but I can be
Easy Going: yeah
Humorous: so I'm told...
Have You Ever…?
Been on a plane: lots o' times
Kissed a mirror: no...
Driven a car: yeah...I kinda had too for Driver's Ed, you see
Gotten lost: physically, emotionally, psychologically...you name it
Yell at someone when you didn’t mean it: yeah
Done drugs: nope
Kissed someone: beyond relatives, no
Made out: no
Woo-Hoo-ed (sex): (to borrow Megan's words) Do you SEE any ring on my finger?? NO
Broken a glass: yeah, then stepped on it
Cried your eyes out: yes, quite often
Hurt someone emotionally: I have
Hurt someone physically: my attempts don't usually go over well
Swam in the Ocean: yes
Fallen asleep during class: Darn biology videos are so boring and I hadn't slept last night...
Read a whole novel in one day: yeah, that's why the librarians love me
Watched someone die: Only in my dreams (I have morbid dreams...no, seriously)
Fallen in love: It was only a matter of time until that question was asked, wasn't it?
Stolen: never...*shifty eyes*
Eaten toothpaste: no
Eaten soap: No, I use it to get out blood stains. The brand from the Paper Street Soap Company works best! (*is patted on the head by Tyler Durden for advertising*)
Snuck out of the house: nope
Fallen in love with a fictional character: I don't fall in love with them, but there are some who are really hot and lovable...like Sanzo!!
Will you fill this out and pass this around: sure, why not?